Facts

• my name is polly and i’m straight 
• well actually it’s pollyanna but shut up ok 
• call me poll doll and i’ll love you down x
• i really should have called myself anna, it would have saved me from a lot of parrot-related jokes 
• i’m 15 and from Surrey, in the south of England
• i have two sisters (victoria and daisy) and i talk about them a lot because they are comedy gold
• my dad is posh and my stepdad is bald 
• my hair is like dead but i try to resurrect it every now and then with deep conditioner 
• i’m not exactly fat but i eat like an american man in mcdonalds after running 10 meters to the counter 
• i have an interesting view on life and i try to find the humour in most things
• you should read my diary for more of my tales 
• my face is annoying because it doesn’t look how i want it to
• i dress like a tart but its okay because my mum says i look cute
• i like cheese more than i should
• as in i really really like it
• i grated half a standard cube just for me once 
• then i grated some more
• you see the problem yes?
• i use “omg” in most text posts, and if not i use “omfg”
• i should really stop omg but i can’t
• i’m short and i can’t even hide it because heels reject me, i am a complete fail of a female 
• one time i was wearing heels and i fell backwards into a pram and there was a baby in it and i had to run away really fast because the mother was hysterical but i couldn’t run because i was still wearing the heels so i threw myself over a nearby fence and crawled off
• when people talk to me every day via facebook chat or anything i start to dislike them so don’t do that ok
• i hate people who talk like they forgot half the alphabet 
• when people unfollow me a little part of me dies inside so don’t unfollow me
• i’m addicted to neopets
• i hate people touching me, unless i fancy the pants off them
• like any intimate contact whatsoever, i’m not a hugger, a hand holder, a thigh to rest your hand on, or a kiss-goodbye-er